Bonny Snowdon 00:06
Hello, I'm Bonny Snowdon, ex-corporate person, a mother turned successful artist entrepreneur. It wasn't that long ago though that I lacked the confidence, vision and support network to focus on growing my dream business. Fast forward past many life curveballs, waves of self-doubt and so many lessons learned and you'll see Ignite, my thriving online colour pencil artists community, a community that changes members' lives for the better and gives me freedom to live abundantly whilst doing what I love and spending quality time with my beloved family and dogs, all whilst creating my best artwork with coloured pencils, and mentoring others to do the same. But this life wasn't always how it was for me, it used to only exist in my imagination. I've created the It's a Bonny Old Life podcast to help increase people's confidence, share mine and my community's experience and hope through fascinating personal stories, champion the other amazing humans in my personal, professional and membership community, and create another channel through which I can support others to realize their dreams. If you're a passionate coloured pencil artist, or an aspiring one who's looking to create their best work, and a joyful life you love, you're in the right place. Grab a cuppa and a custard cream, let's get cracking.
Nina Maddens 01:50
Nice to see you again.
Bonny Snowdon 01:52
Oh, it's lovely to see you as well. It feels really familiar.
Nina Maddens 01:55
Yeah, it does. I know that room so well now. I can see all the pictures; the chair and it does feel familiar.
Bonny Snowdon 02:11
It's quite a while ago now. But we had 16 days, didn't we? All of us together in the in the coaching cohort?
Bonny Snowdon 02:19
You really get to know people even though you're not with them. You're only with them virtually, and you still really get to know people. It was such a lovely group.
Nina Maddens 02:19
Yeah.
Nina Maddens 02:27
Yeah, I think it was really amazing. I think the connections that were made and just the whole. It was just something really wonderful to have that sense of people feeling safe enough to bring their whole hearts to the situation, to every conversation like to come fully into it. I think there was a real safety created. I'm just very pleased that we were able to do that to be honest.
Bonny Snowdon 02:59
Definitely. Obviously, I joined your coaching and NLP course, which was over the 16 days. Honestly, you never know what you're going to get out of these courses. It's always like, oh, yeah, I'm going to do this. It's quite an investment of time. It's much easier for me, because I could do it from home. So, I don't have to travel anywhere. But you always think, oh, gosh, what am I going to learn because I've done a coaching degree before. But you came from it, from a completely different place. The other thing that I got from you, I guess it was in that coaching space. But it was more about how you handle people in an environment. I can remember, I must give you some feedback as well. I'm so sorry. I'm terrible. I will send you feedback. But I can remember at the beginning, I was like, she's stopping us and asking questions. This is the best part. It got more and more clear that you were creating this space where people could talk and not interrupted. Not be interrupted by people just interrupting speaking, but interrupting by putting their hand up or they have something in the chat. I've struggled with that sometimes in my own Zoom, when I'm trying to create something or talk about something, and then suddenly somebody's chatting and it pops up and I'm like, I've lost my train of thought now. I found out how you manage that. Absolutely brilliant.
Nina Maddens 04:39
Yeah. I'm really passionate about giving people the space to be fully and the problem with the way people are running things because they don't have the right principles in place. So, it becomes the extrovert that speaks the most or it becomes like popcorn style where people are just throwing things in and it's not coherent. It's not fair. It's not fair to the introvert. So, the deep thinkers who take a little bit of time. It's that principle of attention and I think, explaining also that everyone is going to get their turn and having that seating arrangement that we set up in the beginning with the order. So, everybody knows they're going to get their turn. So, attention is required, attention is like the sun on a plant that's growing. Is that photosynthesis thing if you give someone attention. That's what a lot of people don't understand when they come on webinars. They're just there to consume, they don't understand that their face in the Zoom box and their attention that’s present really contributes to the overall experience. It's just about setting that up and explaining that to people. Then these principles that are quite simple with you have an order. Everybody gets time to speak, everyone gets their three minutes, and everyone gets then listened fully and relax without sticking their hand up or putting things in the chat. So, we are being really present with the person speaking and giving the person who's speaking their full attention. Which it involves managing our own emotions. Because when someone's speaking, we have this rise and fall of emotion. I'm curious about this, I want to ask this, I have an opinion about this, I want to say something about this. The managing our own internal emotions and knowing that, no, I'm giving attention to the person talking now. It's not about me, it will be my turn, then I can talk and say what I want to say. I will have my turn.
Bonny Snowdon 04:54
It was a really good structure. Certainly, something that I want to bring in. My Zooms at the moment they're a bit big just because of the groin and stuff that I do. But I've got some masterminds that I want to do in the future. That structure is absolutely perfect.
Nina Maddens 07:21
I might run a little course on exactly the principles of how to do it. Just a short little thing. Then people can have the principles and implement it.
Bonny Snowdon 07:38
That would be amazing. I think I've got my youngest son arriving back now. So, the dogs are going to go away.
Nina Maddens 07:44
I will probably get my dogs going.
Bonny Snowdon 07:49
So, I just want to know a little bit more about you and what you do, where you've been and how you started doing what you're doing. Just your amazing story, basically.
Nina Maddens 08:04
So, my journey is like, I think I was always finding an adventure. I was born in Dublin, and I grew up in Sweden, my mom is Swedish, my dad is Irish. But I went off and I lived in different places. So, I lived in South-east Asia during my 20s and Laos and Thailand. I had two businesses there, I had an art gallery, and I was really into art. I got married and I got divorced. My kind of life quest has always been, I've always been quite a deep thinker. I've always been asking the big questions like. What’s the purpose of my life? Surely, there has to be a meaning to it. Like, why are we here? What makes people happy? All these kinds of big questions. I looked at psychology and counselling as a second career. I was initially in the art world, and it didn't give me the fulfilment or the answers that I was looking for. It didn't give me that. But I always had a calling to help people. I was always a healer. I was always helping animals or people. I looked at psychology and counselling, and I've had therapy myself because I suffered from depression, and I was suicidal as a teenager. So, I had very severe depression. I've had therapy several times throughout my life. Even though I had that experience, I felt like the disciplines, they were not empowering. They were not positive; they were not uplifting. I tended to feel worse, and I didn't feel like it gave me a way out of my suffering, I guess. It was in 2006, which I just came across life coaching by chance. I just pulled out an ad from a paper, I think it was the metro. I went to a little coaching seminar and I got so excited by the tool and about the principles that this lady was talking about. She was talking about how we all have the resources and how we're powered. I took it from there and I just kept developing it, learned NLP and found that they were really empowering, and helped me to change my own life. Also, with the people that I met, just meeting like-minded people that were looking to have purpose in their lives to make something quite fantastic. Because if we're lucky, we're here for 80 years, 90 years. So, we really got to do it. I feel like we have to do something with it. That's the most important thing. We have to be happy ourselves. But we also have to make it a better place for other people. So, other people can be happy. That's how I came into it. I guess it's grown from there. So, it's 15 years, I've been delivering coaching courses since 2012. I've been a coach and a therapist since 2007-2008 when I started.
Bonny Snowdon 08:18
Gosh, so a long time.
Nina Maddens 11:27
Yeah, it's been a long time.
Bonny Snowdon 11:32
Just picking up on what you were saying just there. We're here to be happy. We've all got some kind of a purpose. The other thing that I absolutely loved about your course it was coaching NLP. You brought in the meditation, you brought in snippets of the law of attraction, which honestly, I just absolutely love. I'm listening to all of the Abraham Hicks, infinite intelligence, the podcast, and I do listen to it.
Nina Maddens 12:06
Yeah. I have listened to it.
Bonny Snowdon 12:09
I just love it. She's is the most hilarious woman. She's just brilliant. What I love about her is, she comes out with this amazing stuff through Esther. If somebody's taken up too much time, it's just like, okay, we're on to the next now. But it's all done in a really great way. There's no nastiness. But it's like, are we done right now? Well, I'm done with you. On the next. I love it. I just think it's brilliant. I'm even looking at going on one of her cruises.
Nina Maddens 12:53
Oh, wow. When we speak from a soul level, we're connected to an infinite understanding. That makes us incredibly interesting when we speak from that level. I think when we speak from the heart, the heart as well it's also something incredible. When you speak deeply from the heart, people sit up and listen to you. It's when you go into a fearful mind and start spinning around that it becomes something that again, it's not interesting now, we've got to move on. Because we're not bringing our whole hearts. We're just repeating old patterns or telling a story we've told 15 times before because we're irritated with something. Some people call it ego. Other people call it other things. When you know, and it's so fascinating to listen to someone, is because they're speaking from the heart. Usually is because it's fresh. What they're saying is something that they're just thinking in the moment, they haven't thought of before. It's not rehearsed. That's when people become really fascinating. We talk about connecting. Everyone is talking about connecting and community. But it's required we have to connect with ourselves. We have to speak from the heart when we're connected. That's how we then automatically connect with anybody that we're speaking to. I think that's the key. My freshest thinking.
Bonny Snowdon 14:30
Yes. When you're obviously coaching your clients, and you have people who want help and everything. I find that there's all sorts of different kinds of people. But I find that there are almost two different camps. One that is open minded enough to be able to look inside and go, well hang on a second. If I need to make any changes, it's got to be through me. I need to make changes to who I am, how I behave, how I react. Then there is the other camp of people. I think probably many people go through both. Who intrinsically, just don't take responsibility and blame everything on something else, or someone else. When you're coaching someone, I find it really hard. I'm more of a mentor than a coach, because I tend to find solutions that have helped me that will help somebody else. Rather with the true coaching, it's all about getting that person to be helped. But if somebody really doesn't take responsibility for their own actions, it's quite difficult, isn't it?
Nina Maddens 15:48
It's not. It's not that difficult. I don't think it's that difficult. Because they come from a place of of powerlessness, helplessness, hopelessness, which is they're at the bottom of the gutter, basically. As a coach, we're about stretching out our hands and helping people out. They're going to say, I can't get out, I’m stuck in the mud, I'm in the gutter, it is no point, because they've given up. But we don't have to give up on that just because they've given up. If someone is there in front of you, even if they have paid just a minimal amount of money, they're still giving like an hour of that time. So, they're still invested. There's a little part of them that knows that they can change and that they can come out of it. They just need the right approach. That thing of saying, I can't change, that's just a cry for help. It's like, they're not saying I can't change, they are saying, please help change.
Bonny Snowdon 16:49
Yeah. My ex-husband was very much in that camp. Really, truly believed, and sadly he didn't want to stay on this earth. But he truly believed that he was who he was, and he couldn't change. It was heart-breaking, because obviously, I'm very open minded, and I'm completely opposite of that. I found it really, really sad that he truly believed that he was just, this is who he was, he couldn't do anything else. He was stuck in the same job. He said, he hated his job. He didn't hate his job. He loved his job. He said, he hated routine, but he didn't hate routine. He loves routine. Sometimes I say, I wish I could have helped him, I wish I could have given him something else to work with. But it's not my responsibility to be able to do that. It's his responsibility. There are so many people out there like that. Do you have any insight into how you can help someone like that?
Nina Maddens 17:57
First of all, one of the things that we teach really early on in the course is that, everyone has the resources within them to make decisions about their own lives. We're talking about adults, functioning adults here, obviously, not kids. But everyone has their own life path and their own life journey. Just because something works for me, doesn't mean that that's the right thing for them. I have an ex as well. For him, it's all about the paster, the pizza, the olive oil and the wine. As long as he has that, then he's going to be happy. There isn't the intellectual curiosity, or the emotional intelligence of depth that maybe someone like you and I will be looking for. But they may be happy where they are. We say, people have to ask for it as well. You have to create that space. So, people come to you and say, "I'd really like some coaching on this, can you help me?" If they don't come to you, it's not really our business to interfere with their life path, because they may be on the perfect path for them. If they do come and say, "Help me." Then we can help them and maybe it's not on our timeline, maybe you and I would change really fast as soon as we discovered something, maybe it takes another person a year to make a change that we think could be made in a month. But everyone has their own unique class as well. We have to be very respectful. Equality is something that I really value as well. So, when I'm looking at someone who is complaining and looking helpless and hopeless, I have to look at them as an equal to myself and to anyone else. There I have to have a filter of equality when I look at them and to help them as much as I can, if that makes sense.
Bonny Snowdon 19:54
Yeah, definitely. That is such an incredible quality to have, because it's very easy to be judgmental. To look at somebody and judge them. For you to be able to look at somebody and see them as an equal, they don't have the same values or anything as you. That's what makes for an exceptional coach doesn't it. Because you're just looking at them with new eyes, you're not seeing anything going on or judging them or anything like that. One of the things that I learned so much on your course, honestly, I keep going back to it and looking through the notes, I just loved it. Well, there's a couple of things, but one of them that leads on from this is the map of the world, or the territory and map of the world. It's something that I bring into how I talk to people now, and you know somebody's got a problem, or we're talking through something. Really understanding that how I see the world is totally unique to me, and my experience. How somebody else sees it, they're not wrong, and I'm right. That's a really interesting subject to get your teeth into, isn't it?
Nina Maddens 21:17
Yeah, I think that we have to remind ourselves of that. Then look at it like that and match that with this core value of equality. Where I'm looking at everyone being an equal in terms of their own personal power, in terms of their thinking ability. They may not be equal in a hierarchy. Then understanding that everyone has their own completely unique way of looking at the world, it then becomes arrogant and presumptuous of me to say that I have the solution for you. That will just be crazy because you're you, and you have all your experience, and all your history, and all your knowledge, and all the relationships that you've had in your life. They've brought you to this point, you are the best person to think about your own issues. As a coach, we are just facilitating to create the best space for you to think at your very best. That's what it is. I think that's what it's all about.
Bonny Snowdon 22:29
Yeah, definitely.
Nina Maddens 22:30
You become your own mentor, your own wise guy and your own guru. You're listening to the guru within. That's the goal.
Bonny Snowdon 22:43
When I go through these personal development things and everything, and you learn about these things. I am very curious, I've realized I am very curious, and I want to learn more about how I take and how others take everything. But learning it, it almost makes you think, why don't they teach this in schools? Why don't they teach all of this incredible stuff? My youngest has just left school, and bless him. He crashed his car last week. There's all of that fallout from all of the phone and the assurance and all of that kind of stuff. He was like, "Mom, I don't know what to do. I don't know who to call. I don't know what I need. I don't know this. I don't know that." He said, "Why didn't they teach me this in school? Why didn't they teach me how to lead my life?"
Nina Maddens 23:40
It's an extremely good question. I don't know the answer to it. It's an incredibly good question. There's a lot of things they don't teach.
Bonny Snowdon 23:48
A lot of probably stuff that they don't need to. Luckily, he's got me and I can teach him. I can show him what he needs to do and all three of mine are really, quite well grounded. But stuff like that honestly, can you imagine what people would turn out like if they knew all of these things, and they knew how they worked inside. Things would be very different, I think.
Nina Maddens 24:22
They could teach more emotional intelligence and more practical things like life skills and money things. God knows why I have no answer. I have no idea why they don't teach so many useful things.
Bonny Snowdon 24:39
Madness. Then the other thing that I absolutely fell in love with and I'm like, "Oh, my goodness, I just adore this." I probably got completely the wrong label for it. But it's the presupposition, it's what you take in and then your brain wills it around, decides what it is that been filled in, and then it comes out with the answer. How you can have two different people, basically saying exactly the same thing with different words, one will make you feel amazing and empowered, and the other one will make you feel so miserable you want to go back to bed. But they basically said the same.
Nina Maddens 25:20
Yeah, I guess what you're probably referring to if I understand you is the presuppositions that carry the language. Versus, how are we going to celebrate when your podcast is reaching 50,000 downloads, Bonny. We're going to have a party and that happens. It's a presupposition that you are going to reach lots of people and they are going to be lots of downloads? That's one type of presupposition. Versus another type of presupposition is, I guess, Bonny, you could try doing a podcast, and if it fails, then you can come up with something different. Then you're going to go, yes. You're also trying to maybe be supportive, but coming maybe a little bit misguided. Coming from different directions. It's just, what are we assuming, what are we projecting? What are we seeing in the other person? I think that's a huge thing. How am I communicating and being aware of it? Also, that thing of listening like, what am I looking for? What am I listening for? Because appreciation is another core value of mine. I think, if we learn to look for what is amazing in people and what is amazing, we can really start to see what people's superpowers are. They don't know those themselves. But you have the best expression, of course, which I've used the Bonny glasses. Do you remember, you said something along the lines like, ladies, if you could see yourself the way I see you, if I could take my glasses off and give them to you, and you could see yourself the way I see you, you wouldn't understand how amazing you are. This is something we don't do much. We don't appreciate each other. We don't look for it. I think it's a fault. It's a fault and a failing of us when we don't see appreciation. It's a way of looking, if we have 50,000 pieces of information that comes to us. What are we filtering for? We're filtering for what is really amazing in the person in front of us, are we filtering for what is wrong? Or how they don't fit our expectations?
Bonny Snowdon 27:52
I find a lot of that as well is, how you are within yourself. I'm a very positive person. I have my moments and everything. I'm really working hard on appreciating everything. For example, Sid had his car crash last Monday, which kicked up this whole thing of, I had to call insurance companies. I had to get in touch with the police, I had to do this, that and the other. On the Tuesday, I had a team meeting. I was in the team meeting, and my head wasn't in it. I just went, "I can't do this meeting, I'm really sorry, you carry on, I'm not going to be in the meeting and this whole day." I basically wrote the whole day off and I was just like, I just can't do this. Because I was so stressed about the website's not working properly, and you're trying to do something and doesn't work. Then because I was stressed anyway, that was exacerbating it. From that I could have just gone, the whole week could have just been written off. But actually, I sat and reflected. What I came up with was actually, I had to almost go through this experience of being fed up, not being in the meeting, to come to the conclusion that I didn't need to be in the meeting and I could have been doing something much more productive. It's then led me to go, I want to just very slightly restructure how my working week works. That wouldn't have happened if I hadn't cut through this crap beforehand. I'm not saying his accident was meant to be or anything like that. But I could have taken it one of two ways. I could have gone, oh my god, this is awful. My whole weeks ruined. Or I could have gone, this has taught me a really great lesson that I don't need to do this and this, and I can restructure things so that my week is better. I took it as that. But I'm very much in that frame of mind. I'm very much in something rubbish happens. I'll reflect on it; I'll take a lesson from it and I'll learn from it. Rather than going into getting all upset about it long term. That I think over the last I'd say 18 months, I've really started to appreciate everything. A journey in a car and then held up by a tractor. My initial thoughts that, for goodness’ sake, I’m behind a tractor, this is really slow. Then I'm like, hang on a second, I can listen to more of my podcast, because I'm going really slow. I'm in the car for an extra 20 minutes. Wow, isn't this great?
Nina Maddens 30:38
I'm just being in the countryside to have a tractor it's pretty awesome as well. Absolutely Bonny, I think we have a choice. But I also think, like we're being quite resilient, and we're quite positive. I think that has quite a healthy baseline. But when you are suffering and you're in pain, you need health, you can't really be expected necessarily to have a healthy baseline. If you had to have trauma, you had to have suffering, then we are going to be in pain. When you're in pain you're more judgmental to others because you've got such low opinion of yourself, you're going to be judging others to try to raise yourself up a little bit, you're going to have very low self-esteem and you're also going to have very low confidence. Smaller things are going to trigger you and it's going to set you into a spin. This is how our nervous system reacts as well. In those cases, it's hard. I think the positivity can become toxic because people don't have the depth to understand that people that are in pain can't really be positive. So, it's the pain element that needs to be looked at and they need help with that. I think that's where therapy can come in. I qualified as an EMDR therapist as well, which deals with trauma, more of them the much harder stuff really. It's extraordinary once you can help people with those underlying traumas, how they can be released from their behaviours. Actually, you talked about your ex. I think a lot of that stuff is trauma related or unresolved. Trauma sounds very dramatic. It doesn't always have to be so dramatic, but unresolved issues and people end up coping, so they have these coping mechanisms. Maybe they feel helpless and hopeless as a coping mechanism.
Bonny Snowdon 32:52
I've lived with somebody for a long time who suffered from chronic depression. Who in the end ended his life. It was awful. It was horrific for him clearly. I find it really, really hard. I do reflect on it, I do think about it, and I try to understand. But we were almost like, poles apart.
Nina Maddens 33:29
You have to be probably because being around someone, even just your mirror neurons are going to respond and absorb that person's energy and emotional feelings, because that's how we are as humans. We are intimately connected to the people around us. If someone is in depression, or in pain, we're going to feel that pain, because that's how humans survive. Ultimately, like when they were on the Serengeti, to empathy and through report. So, it's almost like a coping mechanism. I guess maybe that you developed to be the polar opposite to create as much distance from that suffering that you could so it wouldn't drag you down basically. How else could you live with that? You'd be out there and despair with them.
Bonny Snowdon 34:22
No, that would have been. Having the family and everything like that. One of the things that I tried to do, and I'm not sure whether it's the right thing to do or not. It feels like the right thing. But with my groups, what I'm trying to get people to do, so when somebody draws up a piece of art and they're a beginner, sometimes you'll get, "Oh my goodness, I've drawn this, I'm so proud of it." It doesn't matter what it looks like, because in their eyes they are incredibly proud of it. Like me with my first drawing, I was incredibly proud of it. I look back on it now and I think, well, it wasn't very good. But I was really proud of it, because that's the kind of person I am. You'll then get somebody else who draws something and I think it would be really good. They'll go, it is rubbish, this is wrong, this is wrong, this is wrong. They find all of the bad things about it, but they can't pick up on any of the good things. What I'm trying to do in my groups is encourage people to, yes, they can obviously ask for help, yes, they can point out the bits that they found challenging, but really find something that they love about their drawing. Even if it's, I finished the damn thing. But just find something that is a positive, because I just think if you're in that environment, and you start using a little bit more positive language around stuff that you do, that can only be a good thing. I'm not saying, somebody can go from being, low confidence, a little bit depressed, have no self-belief, to saying happy things, and they'll be happy. But I think having that, starting to build some different habits, different ways about how they see things.
Nina Maddens 36:22
Yeah. There is some research around the five to one ratio which is, couples that stay together, if there's five positive interactions to every one negative, they will likely make it. But if there's less than five positive interactions, they're not going to make it. With the appreciation, it can be quite easy to implement some small rules, where you have a five to one ratio, where you can say, yes, you can criticize your own drawing and ask for help with it. But before you do that, you have to mention five things that you like about it.
Bonny Snowdon 37:01
Oh, my goodness, amazing idea. But when we come off this podcast, I'm going to go and change my rule.
Nina Maddens 37:10
Yeah, I'm happy to answer it. But first, I want to hear the five small things that you like,
Bonny Snowdon 37:15
That is amazing, I love that. I absolutely love that.
Nina Maddens 37:20
The key to coaching is to get people to do the work. So, you got to set things up a little bit that make them, that force them to sort of because then they have to appreciate it.
Bonny Snowdon 37:33
Yeah. Again, it's like me saying, "Here's my glasses, have a look of what I see. Because I've been seeing this amazing piece of work." It makes me really sad that people feel that they're not doing great stuff.
Nina Maddens 37:51
Then think of it like, that's also how they treat themselves. That's how they look in the mirror in the morning. That's how they get dressed. The same attitude they have to their drawing, they're going to have to themselves, That's the saddest thing.
Bonny Snowdon 38:10
Yeah, because it isn't true. But things will have happened in their lives, and all of those different experiences and everything. A lot of people are just squashed down and made to believe that they're not good enough. Which is incredibly upsetting.
Nina Maddens 38:30
It's very sad and it's a safety mechanism. Most things can be traced back to trying to stay safe. Maybe it was dangerous for them to be happy and proud about something they did or be happy and proud about themselves. Maybe that was really dangerous for them growing up. So, they develop this mechanism that if I criticize myself, I get in there before anyone else can do it. I take the power away from other people. If I say I'm shit, I get in there before my mom or my dad or my brother or sister or whoever.
Bonny Snowdon 39:06
I've done that in the past. I'll make jokes about my size. So, that I get in there so that nobody else feels they have to. In reality, nobody else would have done.
Nina Maddens 39:19
But it became safe to do that somehow.
Bonny Snowdon 39:25
Honestly, it's all so interesting. It really is. The other thing as well, that I'm really starting to appreciate is meditation side of things. I struggle. Because I sit there and I have to have some kind of sound to focus on. If I don't have even then I really do struggle, because my mind is thinking, I'm just going to concentrate on this sound and then something will just pop up from nowhere. Then there'll be something else that happens. I guess that's very similar for everybody. But trying to just quiet my mind a little bit and just having that just restful, peaceful time. It’s just lovely.
Nina Maddens 40:12
Yeah, so I tend to do it through more like processes. Through Reiki, for example. I will do Reiki for myself. I'll give myself Reiki. There is resource building stuff with an EMDR, I might do. Some EMDR stuff for myself, and it has a really powerful impact. Because it helps to process and it helps to quiet the mind and helps calm the mind. It's all about getting us down to that quiet level, where we can hear our heart's desires. We can hear our heart, we can hear our soul, we can hear why we're really here, rather than that busy, fearful mind, that is telling us all sorts of things. So, it's about quieting that mind, and however that's achieved, I think, it doesn't really matter. If it's a walk in the countryside, because the countryside it's got a beautiful way of calming your nervous system, or it's a walk in the park, or it's listening to some really lovely music. It doesn't matter, you don't have to sit cross legged in a chair and try to think of nothing.
Bonny Snowdon 41:31
I've taken up swimming. Sounds very, very posh. But I've joined a country club. It costs the same as if I was going to go to the swimming pool every week. It costs the same a month as it would if I was going to go to the swimming pool every day. But it's the most beautiful place. They have what they call a natural pool, within the spa. It's in this walled garden, and the pool is fed by a pond, which has fish and weeds and stuff. So, this natural pool doesn't have any chlorine or anything, and it's not heated. So, it's cold. For me, just to swim in there, it's just the most amazing feeling. In the whole, it's just the most beautiful thing. I swim slowly, I used to swim for my county, so I can swim or used to swim quite fast. But when I swim, I swim slowly and deliberately. It's so funny, because I'll be there slowly swimming in in this cold pond, and somebody will come in, and they'll be like, "I'm going to get in, is it cold?" They're having this conversation. Then they get in, and then they're like, "I'm going to swim" Then they really swim fast. I like, "Just enjoy it." It is the most wonderful place. It is just fantastic. I'm trying to go as much as I can during the week because everything is just calm. I don't have my phone with me. I found something.
Nina Maddens 43:20
Beautiful.
Bonny Snowdon 43:21
Apart from my drawing, I'm just loving it.
Nina Maddens 43:24
When you are in the pool, swimming there, I can totally imagine it. It sounds amazing. I think I will come and visit you there.
Bonny Snowdon 43:33
Well, you should. My daughter took a video. I said, I'm just going to float, because I've got this thing I can just float. She took a video of me floating on this pool and she posted it on Snapchat to my nieces. They were like, "Oh my god, she looks like a dead body floating." But its lovely. It's just the loveliest place.
Nina Maddens 44:00
I really think it tells us, lockdown as well had this impact for many people who all they could do was maybe just go for a walk and everything quiets down. I know many people suffered in locked down. But also, many people, I think, discovered the quiet within, and just the whole busyness around us. We started to discover the quietness within us and absolutely, how wonderful that can be. Just how that's magical. I think that connects us to something higher, maybe spirituality or connection through nature. I guess it's about feeling like we're part of the world and we're part of something bigger like the trees and the pond and we all come from the same thing. We all come from the earth. We are all one really. You can start thinking and connecting like that. I think that's very healthy. The problem is, of course, if you have turmoil and chaos inside of you. You don't like silence. Because then that becomes exasperate. That's where the therapy comes in.
Bonny Snowdon 45:12
Definitely. I'm thinking we've got 10 minutes. I would really love you to share about your gorgeous little dog.
Nina Maddens 45:23
Yes, he came in a car from Romania. I think, sadly, it was some story around him coming and someone brought him for his daughter, and it didn't work out and everything. Anyway, I just saw his little face on the website and I saw his little face and he was looking at me picture and I just thought you are my soulmate. I need to go and get you somehow. I was actually in Italy at the moment at that time. So, I flew back. I didn't tell my partner at the time what I was doing. I just said, my business really needs me. I went out to the house in Harrow, just came in a little box and nothing. He came with me and he's been with me ever since we are like inseparable. I love him so much. Even through lockdown. So, when I got here, my friend was laughing at me the other day. He’s a little Maltese version mix. His name is Mowgli. He's very confident. He's way too confident for his own good. I went to the countryside outside Oxford to see a friend the other day. She has a greyhound like yours huge. So, his greyhound was thundering through and he was bouncing off to her like a little bunny rabbit, which is why he is flapping. But he loves the water. Is that a tent that goes to Oxford? The river anyway, he jumped right into the river. Yang has to get in and rescue him. He can swim, but there were some parrots and he couldn't get out. So, here's a right little rascal.
Bonny Snowdon 47:11
Like you were saying, you're inseparable and he's with you. I know every time anybody comes to the door, he's barking and it's just like, oh my lord, but you kind of get used to it. But just having dogs around you, is the most wonderful thing, isn't it?
Nina Maddens 47:26
It's so amazing. I talked about getting a dog for a long time, and people say, oh, there's so much responsibilities, so much work. When I got him, I was like, that doesn't make sense. Because the love just takes over. It doesn't feel like a responsibility, it doesn't feel like work. It just feels like you just love this creature and they depend on you. You have to feed them and you have to make them happy. Their happiness is in your hands, which actually is a big responsibility for their health and happiness. He brings me out and he is the social butterfly of the area. So, since I got him, I know all the neighbours now. Well, they know him. All the dogs know each other and we we've been going to the park almost every day. At least three four times a week. To Kensington Gardens and he runs around and has the time of his life and just loves that. If they do, they really have a special place in your heart.
Bonny Snowdon 48:39
Honestly, they so do. We're getting a new puppy in October. Just because three large dogs aren’t nearly enough.
Nina Maddens 48:50
What kind of puppy are you getting?
Bonny Snowdon 48:52
She's a cockapoo. So, she's going to look like a very small version of Nellie [Inaudible]. I think she's 11 days old now. She's called Dora, Theodora as her Sunday name. She's like a dark, chocolatey brown. I've got little chairs. I've got a couple of little chairs that I've got now that my big dogs can't get on. So, those will be hers. She's got space on the bed.
Nina Maddens 49:25
Yeah, well, so people would tell me because he's my first dog since I was a kid. People would say so are you going to carry him at night? I was like, no, I've just ordered some stairs so he can get up into the bed.
Bonny Snowdon 49:41
Well, I might need to do that. Honestly, I wake up in the morning and normally I've got my black and white dog slipper. I've normally got one of her paws, either sort of in my mouth or in my hand and she sort of sleeps on the bed upside down. Then Nanny starts off on the bed when I go to bed, and then in the morning, she's on the floor and the other two have bullied her off the bed and they're there. Nanny literally hanging off the edge.
Nina Maddens 50:17
That’s so funny. There's a cartoon in that definitely.
Bonny Snowdon 50:24
Oh, that is so wonderful, though and they are just always happy, always pleased to see you. I'll go out shopping and come back and it's like, I've been gone for three years. It's been really, really lovely to chat. I love having these conversations. Well, conversations about the dogs, but also conversations about the psychology and how people work and everything. I think it's just so interesting to talk about it and move it backwards and forwards, isn't it? It's been really, really nice to talk to you.
Nina Maddens 51:04
Its been so great to be on with your Bonny. Your enthusiasm and your energy is just wonderful. I admire you so much as what you've done with your business. I've told lots of people about you. It's just a few years, isn't it? Look at what you've accomplished. You must be so proud. You're a rock star. You really are.
Bonny Snowdon 51:31
Thank you.
Nina Maddens 51:31
Yeah, I do. I really do. I've told clients about you. I said, Look at what she's accomplished. What does she do? She draws. She's making a business out of drawing. It's so incredible. It's so inspirational. It takes courage. That's what it is. That's what is it, brave women, it takes courage.
Bonny Snowdon 51:52
The other thing as well is I think it takes an open mind to know when you need to hand stuff over to other people. I've got a really amazing little team of people who are very different. But they just come together and one person has got this amazing quality, one person has got this amazing quality. It's those fantastic qualities from other people around and I've got the most brilliant team. They all are equally fantastic. That I feel is what's really helped me to get to where I am now, which is just wonderful, isn't it? That you can find people who are so passionate about what I do, that they can help me get to where I want to be, which is brilliant.
Nina Maddens 52:44
Yeah. You're lucky. Also, they say, when the teacher is ready, the student appears or when the student is ready, the teacher appears. You're very fortunate because you're intuitive. I think you know how to get the right people. You've made good choices with the people that you've surrounded yourself with. They are all genuine and they are supporting you which is amazing. But it's also a testament to you because it's not easy to work people. So, the fact that you are and then you are able to bring people into a team that's not an easy thing. So, that goes on you again.
Bonny Snowdon 53:27
I'm not very good at taking compliments. I always bash it back.
Nina Maddens 53:32
It's the funny glasses. Your own glasses.
Bonny Snowdon 53:35
They are my own, I know. Well, honestly, it's been so lovely to chat to you and we need to do it more. I need to have everybody. Everybody from the coaching course needs a spa. We will book the spa out and we're going to have a spa day.
Nina Maddens 53:51
Oh my god, I'm going to take you up on that. I'm going to spread a rumour now that will go, you invited us.
Bonny Snowdon 53:56
Yes. That's right.
Nina Maddens 54:03
That sounds gorgeous.
Bonny Snowdon 54:06
Thank you so much, Nina for taking the time to speak to me. We'll catch up again really soon.
Nina Maddens 54:13
Definitely. Take care. Bye.
Bonny Snowdon 54:18
Bye. I really hope you enjoyed listening to this episode of my It's a Bonny Old Life podcast. If you did, I'd be so grateful to you for emailing me or texting a link to the show, or sharing it on social media with those you know who might like it too. My mission with this podcast is all about sharing mine and my communities experience and hope by telling your fascinating personal stories, championing the other amazing humans in my personal, professional and membership community, and to create another channel through which I can support you to realize your coloured pencil and life dreams. If you haven't done so yet. Please help me on my mission to spread positivity and joy throughout the coloured pencil world by following me on my socials at Bonny Snowdon Academy, or by getting on my list at bonnysnowdonacademy.com, and remember, I truly believe if I can live the life of my dreams doing what I love, then you can too. We just need to keep championing and supporting each other along the way in order to make it happen. Till next time
